Thursday, May 12, 2011

64th Annual Cannes Film Festival Opening Ceremonies

It's Cannes Film Festival Again, folks, and as always, the celebs and not-so-celebs smoked a little crack before hitting the red carpet. Let's have a look, shall we?

French actress Vahina Giocante wore a voluminous black gown that was part 60s part peignoir, and 100% too matronly. Perhaps if it were in a color other than black, it might have worked better.

...or maybe if Faye Dunaway had worn it, it would be more appropriate. Better than the shroud Ms Dunaway did wear.

Robert DeNiro's wife, Grace Hightower could have done better than this too-tight mes that's obviously pulling across her hips and showing off a belly pooch. Plus, she looks neckless thanks to the too-high neckline and hair worn down.

There's something cheap-looking about Karine Lima's white gown that I can't put a finger on.

Cheap is better than trashy, like Rachel McAdams in a tacky red lace Marchesa. Maybe this was a good idea on paper, but the wearer can't help but look like the love child of a cat tangled in a ball of yarn and a Wild West madame.

Salma Hayek is a gorgeous woman, but I can't help but want to see her wearing some color, rather than this taupe Gucci. A pretty dress, sure, but I don't think the lack of color really works for her.

Ditto for Aishwarya Rai Bachchan's Elie Saab. It's a pretty dress, but in yet another non-color. Pale taupe-y shades like this remind me of old white t-shirts that have been washed 100 times but have never been introduced to a bottle of bleach. I guess the best word for it would be "dingy."

Here, ladies, let Uma Thurman show you how it should be done. Her Versace gown is simple and elegant and though white, looks nothing like a wedding gown. Love the simple emerald cascade earrings, which keep the attention on Uma's face; while not her best feature, it is the most polite place to look.

Bianca Balti also wore emeralds, and tons of them, but in no way do they work with her somewhat twee bedruffle of an Alberta Ferretti gown. With such dramatic baubles, one needs to wear a simple sheath gown, with no ruffles, bows, or other gee-gaws to detract. This gown would have worked better with more delicate jewelry.

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