Alyssa comes out wearing a dress that would not have been out of place in Isaac Mizrahi's old Target collection. It's not completely awful, but keeping with the tradition of this season, it ain't great, either. At least it's not an unflattering shape or color. She also has the dreaded Button Bag of Doom.
Young Naturists America, a group of people who like to walk around naked for whatever reason. Bully for them, but don't dare put a bare ass on any of my upholstered furniture. The challenge this week is to design fashionable winterwear--'cause even nudists want to put something on when it's cold. Shrinkage and all that. Not only do the designers have to put out something that is fashionable, but also something that their models are comfortable wearing.
Alyssa hands the button bag to last week's winner, Sam, who chooses a person and passes the bag around until all designers have their assignments. They then troop to the workroom with their respective nudists to have a consultation. This brings up a question: is the runway set and the workroom in the same building? If not, that means the naked folks have to cover up in order to get from one place to another, then disrobe again. So contrived. Even if they were in the same building, chances are they had to put on robes at least, so as not to offend the sensibilities of any non-PR people they could encounter on the way from one place to another.
After sketching and chatting, the designers get $250 to spend at Mood.
This bitchiness makes me miss Project Runway Junior. Those young designers had not yet developed egos, so were nothing but supportive toward each other. I didn't find it the least bit boring; in fact, it allowed me to forget that Donald Trump exists and have a little hope for our future.
Zanna comes in to burst the designers' bubbles further. For some reason, she claims to have confidence in Sam to make his insane fabric choices work, but she dumps on Valerie's relatively staid grey/lime/camo/other print choices. She also thinks that Kini has too many things going on, what with his hoodie, coat, kilt, sheer shirt, and whatever else he's planning on whipping up in the next few hours. Zanna says she's all for Ken's manskirt, but her reaction seems to indicate otherwise. She praises Emily's decision to make the skirt and sleeves on her outfit short, so her nudist doesn't have to go from completely naked to completely covered. And before she leaves, she points out the cheap-ass accessories and shoes to remind everyone that Sponsors Are Important.
The naturists come in for fittings, thankfully wearing underwear so they don't rub their junk all over the designer's fabrics. Sam's client doesn't seem to like his green and yellow plaid mohair coat, but she is polite about it. Just the words "green and yellow plaid mohair coat," make me shudder. It sounds like something that a horse should wear, not a human. But Mood had a big roll of the stuff...some unfortunate person out there in the world is going to end up wearing green and yellow plaid mohair. We can only hope that it ends up on an even more unfortunate couch.
Once the naked people leave the workroom, Sam goes from person to person, asking if they have any leftover fabric so he can make something less-ugly than what he's got. Of course nobody has anything left for him, even if they do have scraps large enough to make another garment. Kini tells him that he's made extra pieces though, just in case. Ha ha, Kini, ha ha.
Meanwhile, Mitchell, is turning out something quite different for him - something that looks good. It's simple, not over-embellished, and quite amazing for someone who has never even made a jacket before, much less a wool coat. It's not haute couture, to be sure, but it's better than the average Made by Mitchell rag.
The next day, the naked people are transformed into clothed people. They are also mercifully underaccessorized with junk jewelry and ugly shoes and head to the runway. Alyssa is dressed as Bea Arthur from her Maude days. Maude Goes to a Fancy Party: sparkly black pants, black top, knee-length vest. Some maribou feathers would have really completed the look.
This week's guest judges are fashion blogger Aimee Song and former Halston apprentice, now super well-known designer, Naeem Khan.
The runway show is weird. The models come out naked first, then are automagically clothed by the miracle of television. I love Layana's look, the weird pleated pants and the terrific leather + non-leather jacket. She's in love with it, too, according to her voiceover. We didn't see much of her in the workroom, so it's definitely just a safe look, I also like Emily's and Dom's looks, both of whom are chosen to among the top designers this week, along with Kini, and, what? Mitchell!
I'm not at all a fan of camo, so I can't say anything nice about that part. But her client seemed happy, and that was part of the challenge.
The designers are dismissed and the judges deliberate. Dom's military-inspired coat was great, but not amazing, and Kini's was pretty good, but not the entire look, so they were dismissed early on. That left Mitchell and Emily to contend for the top position. While Mitchell's was pretty amazing--for him--it wasn't quite challenge-winning caliber. Emily's definitely was, and she was awarded her very first win ever.
The two bottom looks were deemed "Salvation Army," "dreary," and "aggressively clueless," which, when applied to Valerie's look, seemed a fairly clueless comment in itself. Yet, the judges noted, both Valerie and Sam pleased their clients. While that was a mandate of the challenge, I'm not sure it was as important as "create fashionable winterwear." By that measure, Sam clearly should have been out, having created neither fashionable nor winterwear. Alas, both designers were given a second chance, the second time this season that nobody went home.
Back in the green room, the other designers were surprised to find out that both Val and Sam were staying on in the competition, merely because they were good designers. It was brought up that neither Stella nor Fade, both also good designers, were given that second chance. And Alexander remarked that perhaps he should try flirting with the judges, as Sam seems to do (at least last week).
Are the producers just trying to ramp up the drama on this show, knowing if they get rid of Sam this week and Mitchell sooner rather than later, there will be that much less drama? Even Ken seems to be comporting himself as a gentleman this season, so he's not a reliable source for crazy anymore.
Things that make you go...hmmm.
Posted by theminx on Opalescentminx.com
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